A coming out story for National Coming Out Day

In honour of National Coming Out Day I have decided to share one of the many coming out stories in my repertoire. Because of course, we actually never stop coming out. It becomes easier and more off the cuff as I get older, but I still see that moment of confirmation/realisation when new people are ‘let in on the secret’.

Not much of a secret, I’ve been in a relationship for almost eight years (2018 edit, almost eleven years with my now husband) and have been ‘out’ much longer (and gay even longer still!) but I suppose a good coming out story to start on (tune in next year for more) is the first one.

I was 14-ish and had jigged school to go smoke in a park down the road with a friend. This friend had her suspicions and liked to push homosexually themed books on me to read, and as such I had devoured Maurice and Holding the Man at a very young age.

Invariably, our conversations would lead to sexual orientation and while we sat on the play equipment of a deserted park, I admitted that I was in fact, bisexual. Now, I am not bisexual and I realise the issues with calling this a ‘gateway orientation’ towards becoming gay because it is a very real and perfectly acceptable orientation all on its own, but for me, this admission was a stepping stone.

Sated for the moment, my friend agreed that this was an excellent way to be, I finished my cigarette and then I assume, life went on.

If anyone honours you so by choosing to come out to you, regardless of when, where or how, please listen and support them and love them for being who they are.

Adrik Kemp smoking in high school